My Alibi

ch-ch-ch-chia...

hello! i havent really been feeling that well for a few weeks now and its really starting to drag me down even more. and my tummy is hurting. i need someone to take care of me.
to top it off, i got into a little brawl with my washing machine a few nights ago. and tonight this comforter kicked my ass pretty hard. lets just say my hand literally got frozen to the door-handle to my backdoor. wtf? why is it that cold??

this is the start of a running list...

it might sound like something that could happen and the start to a story i might tell.....but for now all i will say is that some shit went down, an ambulance came, an ambulance left, but i wasnt the one in it.....

I guess I have that...

this is what i want for christmas. even though i think its being released on the 28th.

how lovely are your branches...

i think it may have occured sometime in september. but our fake christmas tree that was in the box, that we kept in the garage was stolen. so, we dont have one this year. thats kind of lame isnt it? all i know is that it wasnt me who left the garage door open. thank god it wasnt my bike.

un poema para mi amor...

i am not determined today...

i feel like there is no me without you.

give in...

current playlist:

ani difranco-amazing grace
from autumn to ashes-short stories with tragic endings
blink 182-i miss you
further seems forever-the moon is down
plans for revenge-any last words
mock orange-dictionary
jimmy eat world-kill
the jealous sound-whats wrong is everywhere
all-scary sad
alkaline trio-san francisco
brand new-ok i believe but my tommy gun dont
saosin-seven years
nick drake-pink moon
the shins-caring is creepy
the cure-pcitures of you
uncle tupelo-still be around
cursive-fairytales tell tales
billy bragg-new england
yeah yeah yeahs-maps
pixies-wheres my mind?
death cab for cutie-why youd want to live here
frou frou-let go
park-killcollapse

brought to you by...

plans for revenge
death device

maybe better off hit by a train of upcoming postulations
when a letter says "you'll know when" and it's all speculations

never wait: you're getting older - never smile or shrug your shoulder
don't leave home without knowing where you're headed
stand up straight and hold your head high
hold your tears when others may die
I never knew you'd leave before your time without you

I'll say that it's shame that after all you had to leave

here's to the sky of moon and stars you loved so much in the winter
if I could only take them down and put them in your hands for you to see

take this message that I bring to the heavens where you sleep
and tell a tale of life beyond imagination
you're never dead... you're never breathing
your heart's with mine and it's still beating
I never knew you'd leave before your time
without you

i used to struggle with reading...

i think this book is awesome. go check it out. i dont know if i will break down and buy it though. though im sure it would be awesome to see.

we are hummingbirds who are just not going to move...

everyone knows you arent supposed to dry wool sweaters in the the dryer. but one night it was a late and i was in a hurry and totally forgot that i had even washed this particular sweater. it was my favorite sweater. then it shrunk, not a lot, but just enough to make it kind of uncomfortable. boohoo. so last night i googled how to stretch wool sweaters. and i found my answer. hair condition and water. mix it together, put the sweater in and soak. guess what, i think it may have worked. i shrunk the sweater almost a year ago and i just now did something about it. maybe it will be dry by the morning and i will be able to wear it. that would make me so happy.

in session...

it rises from your chest
into your mouth
and comes out a mess.
its the way it always goes down,
never at my best.

so, i close my eyes,
take a deep breath
count to three
and hope this is what it can be.

i promise its not what it looks like.
i know i can do better than this.
will you wait,
while i try?
because im serious this time.

you know i started dreaming again,
i think its a sign.
things will be different.
its getting better,
i promise im fine.

so, close your eyes,
take a deep breath
and count to three.
now open them,
can you see me?

and to each noun, verb and predicate i dedicate a vivid hue

if anyone is still struggling about what to get me for christmas, theres an ani difranco album i really really want. its called educated guess.