My Alibi

take it from whichever angle...

i want to sew a dress, i have some basic schematics already done in my head. i would like to dye a sweatshirt i have as well as dye a tote bag. come up with a design for t-shirts. i want to get a portfolio together, come up with a new great stencil design. organize my shit. get a better job, go on a vacation. get my knee fixed. maybe get a haircut. what the hell am i supposed to do? its one of those moments, or rather a series of them, where i just want to give up. i could talk all day, and i learned at a young age, talk is cheap. you know it, i know it. dont ask me to explain why i think that. im tired of struggling for nothing. i need a break. alot of people have great stories how they had ran across the right person at the right time or something like that. why the hell cant that happen to me? im going to expire.

on a lighter note, i am thinking of getting one of those water purifiers you can put on your faucet.

and madison looks so peaceful right now.

greetings...

My first HTML document

Greetings from

Dissuade & Friends

Composed with care by:
Allie

©2004 and beyond

hold it and keep it alive...

a day like this, is a day you might wait year for, or maybe just a week. but its one of those days thats holds the smallest most simple thing, that will put a smile on your face for the rest of the week. and its small things like that, you can use as a reference point for the rest of your life. yeah, its something trivial and meaningless to alot of people. but its a detail, its a seed that grows inside you. that no one could ever take away.

hopefully, i get to see a movie i've really been wanting to see.

withdrawls....

i want soda and i want it now....

i dont know what made me think of it, but i just had a flashback to when i was a little kid, hanging upside down on some monkey bars, and doing a penny-drop. how weird is that? i would totally be too scared to try that now. haha. i am so lame.

i didnt really have a point to this post, but i will say, i cant remember what exactly the time was tonight when it happened but, i had a precognitive experience. that i was going to talk to this kid named kurt i knew a while ago. which is unusual because we were really only friends by association. and as i was typing the first part to this post, he called my house (land line). which i dont really recieve calls on anymore, because i dont pay that bill, its not really mine to use anymore, in a way. just weird.

night

down, down, down, pick me up, im falling...

today (yesterday) was one of those days, where nothing feels right, nothing goes right. and it just breaks you down. and theres no point in persuing a solution because you are so disheveled it would be impossible to be rational. everytime i feel like i hit the bottom, i just keep falling. night.